


The side of me I don't show

by COMPLIANCE



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, For some reason i feel the need to clarify this isn't shipping sing/ash in any way, Gen, Light Angst, My First AO3 Post, My First Fanfic, My First Work in This Fandom, Secret Crush, Ugly crying i love sing having a crush on ash on the down-low, Unrequited Crush, You can too, and never WILL, do not ship them ever thanks, due to writing reasons ive gotta add some pain in here lawl, i made this fic because i am self projecting myself onto sing wahh, its all painfully real lol, light humor, once again dont ship them, this is not a ship fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:26:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26076406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/COMPLIANCE/pseuds/COMPLIANCE
Summary: Sing Soo-Ling is told he's to meet up with Ash, and without being told why. Sing has a unrequited crush on Ash, he looks up to him but can't help but feel below everyone. He was forced into this life style, but has seen how Ash has sifted through this dangerous life style, better than anyone else, or so it seems. He's intimidated by him, but can't help feeling there's a connection of pain they've gone through, and he wants this opportunity to talk with him seriously. But that may not happen the way sing imagines will happen.
Kudos: 2





	1. Where i stand on the chess board.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fan-fic ever, and I wanna give this a shot, so feedback or any comments over this is highly appreciated and wanted ;__; !! I hope this will be an enjoyable read for you all <3 much love!

"The Lynx said he wanted to meet up with you tonight." The man said in a gruff tone, one of Sing's gang members. He's responsible for reporting any information to Sing, and Ash had seen his face a few times by China Town, Thanks to his best friend Shorter, he was able to locate and know each member's role in the Chinese Gang. It felt like a reminder to Sing that he's got people wrapped around his finger, just like that. The man looked down at his hands which were locked together, then back at Sing's eyes, waiting for a response. 

"Why? ...What for?" Sing responded with a tone of worry tracing in his voice, tilting his head and furrowing his eyebrows in confusion. 

The man, Jian, perked up the side of his lips in amusement and scuffed to himself, shaking his head as he looks down again, this time focusing on the chipped wood floors beneath him, floors that had collected up on dust for months, and had grown used to it to a degree. 'Even the kid is worried of Ash, _hell_ , who isn't.' he thinks to himself. The streets mold people to be cold and hard, even kids are shown to have thick skin, to not show any emotion or sign of weakness or fear, but Sing, despite keeping a relaxed face and tone, is easy to see through. Poor kid. "Didn't say why, all he told me was he's picking you up by 8. He expects you'll be there. You going?"

"Like hell I am, but I don't think Ash is up for options." his shoulders tense up, his voice slightly raised. "Why doesn't he just come to me anyway, he knows where I'm at by now, he sure as hell knows where everyone else is too."

"Listen man, you said it yourself, there ain't no options when we talking about Ash Lynx over here, if he says he wants you, you better be running up there pronto. If it makes you feel better, Ash don't seem like the type to kill some kid, if that's what you thinking." There's a moment of silence, until Jian realizes Sing doesn't have more to say, and reaches into the side of his pockets and grabs out a piece of paper with an address on it. "Ash wanted me to give this to you, that's where you'll see him."

Sing stands up and advances forward to Jian, holding out his hand ready to grab the slip of paper, but Jian pulls away before Sing can grab it. He looks directly at Sing, and after a moment Sing is looking at him, confused and eyes slightly wide. The expression provokes a slight fear at Sing, unaware of what the man is thinking, but it feels bold and intimidating on purpose. That's how it is, that's how you need to be. Still looking back at Sing he slowly puts his arm back where sing can grab it. Sing looks at the paper, then back at Jian, searching for anything in his face that gives him the go, but there is no sign, there is nod, no "i'm just screwing with you." and with that, with no other option, he grabs it, quickly. After some time, he raises hid body back up, and walks toward the door, his eyes turn to the side for a moment, as if there was a moment of self-reflection or deeper thought, then walks out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this on my chromebook LMFAOOOOO the admins be seeing what i wrote and all <3 its okay they should be banana fish stans. please dont block ao3 computer admin thank you <3 writing this all before school starts for the first time tomorrow lawl


	2. Where the road takes me

7:47

...

7:48

...

7:49

Sing sighs and looks away from the clock, he's inside Chang Dai, he figures it's better to wait in here until it's close to 8 o' clock. The location he's supposed to meet at is right by the area. He hasn't seen Nadia, she's been working up on the last meals, although there's less people inside the restaurant at this hour.

There always seems to be an older couple by the side, quietly feasting on their food, the sound of rice and vegetables being sizzled and tossed in a pan, the smell of _actual_ good food in the country. Sing's head rests upon his intertwined fingers, peacefully trying to take his mind off his preoccupied thoughts by gazing off at the Chinese wall decor and menu, occasionally sneaking in peeks at other people and the food resting on their table. There's a better feeling in Chang Dai, where as other places he goes to seem to feel empty and cold to the core, depressing, even if he has gotten used to it, but Chang Dai reminds him more of home, in some way.

He gets some time though, to think off one topic. Ash Lynx. The boogeyman name of the city. He can't tell what Ash wants with him, and not knowing as each minute goes by has his brain running in circles. Regardless, he still tries to remain calm, trying to put a-front a poker face, but he also can't help but smile for a moment over the small gestures or words Ash gave that seemed to mean everything to Sing. "I'm proud of you, kid." was a phrase Ash gave to Sing not too long ago, but the thought of it being told to him made him feel good. The only reason he doesn't hate Ash, was because he's seen him in person without being an enemy, because both Sing and Ash are close friends with Shorter, with Shorter bridging the anonymous gap between them, Shorter going back and forth to run his mouth off over how good the two are, despite what others have said. So with that in mind, his mind is more at ease, but there is still one anxious thought running through his head. The way he can't seem to hide his emotions well and feeling completely weak compared to those around him. To being pushed in the dirt by his own members, and being forced inside the dangers of the streets, to survive. Everyone else seems to got the agenda down with coming off as a guy you don't wanna mess with. He can't even feel relaxed at the thought that he did something to provoke Ash, whether it's now or later, and he feels it's bound to happen.

Seeing Nadia walk through the door with plates and her smile as she hands it off to the customers makes him almost forget about everything. Nadia glances around the room and notices Sing at a table, she gives another quiet "thank you." to the other customers and advances toward Sing. 

her finger touches the table, "Elbows off."

"Huh? Oh yeah." He laughs to himself, and re-postures his arms. "By the way, I didn't mean to come here to order, I'm just waiting until a certain time, if that's okay.. with you?"

Nadia smiles, she's known to keep her thoughts to herself, but she can't help but remember Sing is still just a kid, despite being in a gang. She assumes Sing feels more relaxed at Chang Dai when he's alone, and can let his guard down a bit. The way he slightly swings his body forward and back, and asking permission for something seemingly innocent as to wait inside the restaurant reminds her of Shorter as a kid. "Always. You are family Sing, so if you need to come here any time, please feel free. I just like to shoo away the customers that come before we close, always thinking i have time."

"Yeah, i suppose." he says softly. He wants to say more, but his instincts hold him back from telling her anything much. 

She pats the table lightly, "Let me get you some herbal tea."

"Thanks for the offer, but-" But Nadia is already gone before Sing gets the chance to decline the offer.

7:56

...

7:56

He taps his shoe on the floor, not being able to tell if it's because he's anxious or just impatient... or both. His hands move a bit, sometimes rubbing on the back of his neck, or rubbing his hands on his thighs trying to gain some heat due to Chang Dai not having any form of AC, except slow working fans that frankly don't work. Nadia comes back sooner than expected. Thankfully finding out the tea isn't that hot, he takes long slips of it, and quickly thanks Nadia. She bows her head down and returns a smile at Sing.

Before Sing walks out the door he hears Nadia call out his name, looking back he waits for what it is she called him for. Her mouth opens for a moment, then closes, it seemed clear she was going to say something else, but all that escapes her mouth is 

"Just stay safe, okay?"

he scuffs, ".. yeah. Like i have a choice though, you know that better than anyone else."

"I know." is all she says, all she _can_ say. Sing says goodbye until the only sound is the chiming of the bells wrapped around the door. With so much crime happening and tensions worsening among certain gangs, she can't help but feel helpless on the sidelines. He's only a kid. 

She wipes down the tables with a rag, but there's no water or product cleaner on it. She simply tries to make herself look occupied with the remaining minutes but focuses outside the windows and guides her eyes to where Sing walks off too, despite only being 8 PM, it gets darker in New York during the late fall. She mentally notes where he goes until he makes a turn by a building and is no longer seen. 


	3. Speak of the Devil

After turning a block away from Chang Dai, he looks back at the paper, and paces faster, looking at the street names that stand around him. 

7:59

He's right there. His heart seems to pace a little faster as he approaches closer to where he's supposed to be at. Not the type of pace you feel when you run, just, the sudden urge to know what will happen next, he's seen Ash a few times before, he's even talked with him. He's worried though, he surfs through the ideas running through his head, when was the last time he saw Ash anyways? Did he say something, do something? Was he angry or suspicious the last time they talked? Before he gets the chance to think more of it, Ash's car pulls up by the sidewalk. _Well..._ _Speak of the devil_ The car's lights flicker on and off, and Sing approaches the window close to him. It's tint black. He puts his hands inside his pockets trying to prepare himself to try to look "tough". he's only observed a few people do that on the streets, but everything else seems to be cigarettes, alcohol, or muscles stacked on muscle, none of which Sing can afford to do or get. The window slowly roll down, trying to pick up every detail by the time it's down. Ash is wearing his usual white tank top, brown belt, and some blue jeans, though there seems to be something missing, Sing can't figure out what it is though. 

Continuing tomorrow lol ;__; i have to fix, change, and add so much to all three chapters but i got tired and i got brain fart,,,,,, it'll all be updated tomorrow hopefully! Also! my first day of school is tomorrow! so im lowkey excited but worry i have no idea what tf im doing on there, lets just hope i can add to this fic by then. pleaseee add feedback i really would appreciate it, esp. since this is my first actual fic and i have no idea wtf im doing lmfao. goodnight everyone


End file.
